Become the true master of your life. Sometimes we do so much for others that our vision can become skewed or ideas get lost. Sometimes we focus entirely on one aspect of life, like earning money or public acknowledgement, and then trust other life aspects to be decided by others. On first glance, that singular focus can look like the easy or justified important choice for your life energy. But, like most easy choices, it actually becomes a much harder and complicated situation from which to escape when you realize the rest of your life is out of your control. Along this path, you may have lost your instincts for keen observation, intuitive knowing, safety, and self-actualization.

Are you with your soul family, or are you with friends and family who may not want to support your life decisions that could disturb them? Have you allowed or enabled another to redact content from your life-plan pages? Are you feeling bound by highly restrictive cultural and societal expectations--or a desire for public perception and approval resulting from your own ego and pride? It can be hard to balance yourself when you are surrounded by demanding people. It can be even harder to search inside oneself to understand what emotional wounds may be causing prideful ego to drive decision-making. If you are unfamiliar with unhealed childhood wounds, or traumas, these experiences such as neglect, emotionally distant parents/caregivers, or worse, can result in adult behaviors of co-dependency, trying to fix others, fear of abandonment, need for external validations, need to prove oneself, and people pleasing/deprioritizing one's own needs, amongst other behaviors. Look closely at the type of people with whom you've surrounded yourself and attract.

Of course, assess your responsibilities, then step back and become clear on what will give you a deeper and more fulfilling life. I suggest practicing self-care to rebalance and begin to heal from life traumas. Professional guidance is available to assist in healing. Your life is about YOU--your journey, your lessons, your development, your expression. Follow your heart and make positive changes. And, seek supporters who genuinely want you to thrive.
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Some of you may relish the wisdom in the book, Women Who Run With The Wolves, by Clarissa Pinkola Estés...myths and stories of the wild woman archetype. Perhaps about 20 years ago, I discovered her insight to better understand how we make decisions and fall into traps.--Jeannette Bondurant​©
Photo: Patrice Schoefolt, Pexels.com

A few friends have called out in the night in the past week. I think it's worth saying publicly... Sometimes we need to be babies. Sometimes we need to hear someone say it's going to be OK and that we are valued and are seen and truly loved by others. We are not alone on this journey. We all have different versions of it. Sometimes we make it messier before we clear it--that's just how some of us need to learn. Lessons and loss can be extraordinarily difficult to process and swim through.

Gentle reminders...You are loved and valued more than you know. There are kind and seeing hearts around all of us. Often our self-doubts--or feelings that we are unworthy of love unless producing work or service--and the causal wounds of childhood, neglect or coldness or unenlightened parenting or worse, can affect our ability to find our footing when things seem to crumble.

If you don't feel strong, I suggest the following: Pretend you have more self-love. Feel it. Absorb it. Live in that imagining, and make it manifest. Pray for courage, insight, and support, or whatever is in your heart. Then, call a friend. Take care that you don't give your power away to destablizing circumstances and fear, or controlling persons whom you deem as authority figures. It is really and only about you. Your life. Your perception. Your love. Your free will.
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Find your strength, integrity, and voice. Friends and professionals are within reach if the journey seems too much. You are loved and valued by many. People just forget to say it enough. --Jeannette Bondurant©
Photo: Pexels.com

October Tuesday, just about bedtime. Took a late night drive in inky black central NC country. My soundtrack was the sole option offered...Def Lepard, Police, Rush, Frampton, and Foreigner. No street lights. No highway signs. No embedded road reflectors. Just me and my headlights in an arc, pacing along the dashed white lines to rock music. My soft black leather jacket seemed just right. There was no demarcation where the thick black corridor of woods would have silhouetted against the sky. Passed through a pungent cloud that in Cali would be colitus but here was a reminder of natural wildlife. Began praying no deer would launch out. It's primetime buck rutting season; they're crazed. And then, I turned off on my exit. There it was...a sole street light illuminating the deserted local Outlaws biker headquarters. Almost to my place, now.  What decade is it?  Welcome home, city girl...
-- Jeannette Bondurant©
Photo: günter, Pixabay

We've all experienced dark times, whether it's financial, environmental, or personal loss/disappointment. I apply the hard-to-believe adage of there's a light at the end of the tunnel, especially from an emotional and spiritual perspective. Through soul-searching experiences that usually last uniquely for as long as we individually need to grow and understand things from a new perspective, it seems we can emerge in a brighter light of self-awareness, new understanding of others, and greater self-love. I've experienced these epiphanies after situational distress. Yes, it can be damn hard and could last for years. You are not alone in these journeys. They are universal. I've been there. My friends have been there. And, stories abound from history in all cultures about these journeys. It seems this is the way toward a more enlightened, compassionate, and balanced life. At least for me, it is the proverbial blessing in disguise. No one said life would or should be easy--although living with more joy and manifesting the life you desire appears to be easier when lessons are embraced rather than fought. A very wise friend once said to me, when you keep hitting your head against a wall, that's not your path and that when the "Universe" rolls out a red carpet, don't hesitate, because you are being shown the new way to turn. I embrace that philosophy with eternal hope and expectation. My joy of life is partially rooted in this belief. --Jeannette Bondurant©
Photo: Germán TR, pexels.com